The West Enders: Episode Twenty-Two, Not the Sharpest Tool in the Shed

SG209192It’s Saturday afternoon, and Tommy has invited Mira to meet him at the pub for an aperitif. To Mira’s annoyance, Lilli is there as well. Tommy buys some drinks and when Lilli excuses herself to go to the ladies room, Mira decides to confront him.

“I see you decided to bring Lilli along again,” she says drily.

“I didn’t bring her along,” says Tommy. “She just came along.”

“What do you mean, ‘she just came along,'” asks Mira in surprise. “It sounds as if she was at your house. Or didn’t you come from home?” One of Mira’s biggest annoyances with her relationship with Tommy, is that if they are ever alone, it’s always at her place. She’s never been to his house.


Tommy stares at Mira in astonishment. “Yes, I came from home. So what? Why are you interrogating me, this way, Mira? You actually sound jealous. It’s not becoming.”

Mira ignores his last comment. “Working on a Saturday?”

“No, we weren’t working.”

“What are you saying to me, Tommy? You make it sound as if Lilli lives there or something.”

“Of course, she doesn’t live there! She’s just staying with me until she gets her own place.”

“What? Lilli is staying at your house?”

“Well, of course she is. Where did you think she was staying?”

“And just how long has this been going on?”

“Since she arrived. I don’t understand what’s wrong with you, Mira.”


Mira takes a long drink of her glass of wine as Lilli joins them. “Looking as smug as ever,” Mira thinks. “Oh, this is not becoming. What am doing in this relationship? I don’t want to be part of a bloody harem!”


To make a bad situation worse, the three are joined by another beautiful woman, who Mira recognises as one of the back-up singers for the Ladies in Black.

“Tommy, darling,” she coos, “How fabulous to see you!  Have you heard the news? I’m leaving the Ladies and going back to modelling. Barbie is opening her own fashion house, hired designers, models, everything. But I’m still really interested in pursuing a solo music career as we discussed earlier. I hope you’ll keep that in mind.”

“Of course I never forget you, angel,” says Tommy. Mira is feeling more and more annoyed. She tries to compose her thoughts, feeling guilty that someone who teaches yoga and meditation should become so agitated so quickly.

“Let me introduce you to Mira,” says Tommy. “She owns the local yoga studio. Of course, you know Lilli.”

SG209199Salynda turns to face Mira. “So nice to meet you, Mira,” she says. “I love yoga! I’ll have to try one of your classes sometime.”

“I’m sure we’d love to have you,” answers Mira politely. She hasn’t missed the fact that Tommy has not introduced her as his girlfriend.

SG209194Salynda turns back to Tommy and asks, “Why don’t we get together some time for dinner and talk over what’s required to launch a solo career?” she says. “You can come round to my place. I’m a fabulous cook and I’ll bet you’re missing some good Chinese home cooking.”

This is all Mira can take.

SG209201“Right, well, nice to see everyone. I’m heading down to the yoga studio to check up on the young people. They’re up to something down there.” She puts her drink on the bar and hurries out.

The pub sits on a hill and the yoga studio occupies the lower floor. There is an entrance to the pub on the street at the top of the hill and one to the yoga studio at the bottom. There is also a staircase from the pub to the studio but it’s usually locked. This connection makes the yoga studio perfect for Kevin to rent when he has a big event on, although Mira is very strict about not allowing alcohol downstairs.

SG209189Once down the stairs, Mira tries to compose herself. Yuki is teaching Rikki how to be a DJ. Zayn, who, unbeknownst to Yuki, would do anything for her, has promised to have some dance nights for the teens and tweens in the café when the new academic year starts. As a Muslim, he doesn’t drink alcohol, so he’s happy to host alcohol free events.

“How’s everything going?” asks Mira with false cheerfulness.

“Great!” says Ryan, who is there with Momoko. “Rikki’s going to be a fine DJ.”

SG209190“She certainly is,” adds Yuki from across the room. “And look, she’s got a following already!”

Back upstairs in the pub, more interesting conversations are happening.

SG209203Marilyn Baker has arrived, another one of the backup singers for the Ladies in Black. She’s also an aspiring actress and latches on to Liam Hemingway, who has come in as usual. He’s a regular.

“Oh, you’re Liam Hemingway,” Marilyn gasps. “I’ve seen all your films! I’m Marilyn. I’m an actress myself, although at the moment I’m not working other than singing. I’m one of the Ladies in Black.”

SG209205“All my films? I’m very impressed, Marilyn,” says Liam, eyeing her speculatively. He’s thinking something very different, however, first noticing her very low cut sundress. Is it possible that a woman is actually hitting on him instead of the other way around for a change? He can hardly believe his luck.

Behind him, Sutton, who has spent the entire afternoon in the pub chatting up a beautiful newcomer, is overjoyed to see someone he hasn’t seen in ages.

SG209207“Merida! You haven’t come here in so long! Too long. I’m so glad to see you. We didn’t really part friends and I’m really sorry about that.”

“I see you’ve met my friend Ariadne,” replies Merida drily. She’s not sure it was a good idea to come here. Ariadne Kostopoulos is an old friend from her modelling days and has arrived to join Barbie’s new fashion venture. Merida has been showing her around the village and as the George is the only pub around, it’s a natural spot in which to meet.

“Merida’s told me all about you, Sutton,” says Ariadne coyly. She’s a bit of a troublemaker and finds Sutton both attractive and somewhat silly in his transparency. And he’s also had just a wee bit too much to drink.

SG209211After another drink, Ariadne announces, “Time for a selfie!”

As they move into position, Sutton is overcome at being so close to Merida again. “Why is she so gorgeous?” he thinks somewhat drunkenly. “And her hair smells so good.”

SG209212“Perfect!” announces Ariadne. “Now I’m going to send you a friend request on Facebook so I can tag you in this photo. Then you can download it! Isn’t it good?”

IMG_3970“Wow, great shot, Ariadne!” says Sutton, not thinking about the ramifications of a picture of himself and Merida appearing on Facebook. He’s been dating Erika Holmes since the barbecue last May and she isn’t very likely to enjoy seeing a photo of him with Merida. She’s heard about his flirtation with Merida from Blessing. Sutton also doesn’t realise that Ariadne snapped another picture of him just before she took this one, and she’s not going to tell him.

Oh, Sutton, you’re really not the sharpest tool in the shed!

What’s Erika going to say? And what about Tommy and Mira? Is there any hope for this relationship? Stay tuned for the next episode!


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